#AprilWritingChallenge – Day 18 – I am currently infatuated with…

I’m currently infatuated with finding out who I am, and I’d like to credit this to Ms. JasFly. Her journey, her process, her travels on that never-ending  road of self discovery, and especially the words she’s personally had for me have helped me realize how important is it to find out who you are before trying to properly pursue anything in life.

She really kicked it off when I stumbled across her Tumblr maybe a year or so ago and saw that she had “The Alchemist” up as her current obsession (I’m sure she has others now, but it’s still up there). I’d heard of the book before, but the way she spoke about it was the turning point in my delving into it, and I’ve been exploring its lessons ever since.

The Alchemist is one of those books you need to read every three to six months or so because the gems it has buried so eloquently into it only show themselves when your personal light shines on them correctly. And that light is never the same over the course of 3 – 6 months. Since discovering that book, I’ve been reading about and finding so many other things that have opened up the window to my own soul.

Among those is my writing. I’ve found out how important writing is to my existence and my purpose on this planet and I’ve been searching for ways to refine this decidedly beautiful extension of me. Writing is me, and it’s part of the way my soul breathes. There have been many times where I straight up denied writing as part of me and that it was just something I did because I was frustrated with my life. But as I learned to quiet the white noise inside and outside my head, I started to notice these clear-cut signs that this is exactly what I am.

I may not have taken the same path as other writers that I know and deeply love and appreciate, and I may not be as talented as they are, either. I do know, however, that with this unfiltered listening of myself and my soul, I will reach the place I’m supposed to reach, and writing will find its place in that journey, as it has with those people. And it will be beautiful, as it has been.

It may be a coincidence that JasFly is also a writer, and that’s no small part of her importance in my journey, but I know she was put in front of my eyes for me to see how much of a jittery journey this thing called life can really be. And the more jittery the road, the more important the lessons you learn while on that path. Also, the places you can reach if you stick to the path that feels right within your growing heart… those are going to be greater than you could ever imagine.

She said that she was told by someone, that whatever you do, whatever you go boldly into, operate as if you know for a fact, that you will be ok. The reason is because you (me, her, everyone) will be ok. I deeply believe and follow that now, and it has led to a much more positive day-to-day experience.

Without faith, that all sounds ridiculous. I used to know how faithlessness felt, but I don’t anymore. I have my journey of personal excavation, and JasFly to thank for that.

So, it’s safe to say that although this started as an infatuation, it’s grown into a full on love for myself and the discovering of ME. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done with my time and energy and I’m going to continue to put into it as much time and energy that I feel is necessary.

Anything less is doing a disservice to yourself, and you can’t over-invest in yourself.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s