#AprilWritingChallenge – Day 20 – I never want to go back to…

Ah. I never want to go back to not knowing what my inner voice sounds and feels like. In a nut shell, it sounds like home and feels like.. resolve.

It’s when you rely on your feelings. When you truly allow, “it’s just doesn’t feel right” to be good enough reason to decline something. It’s when you start to recognize and rely on whether or not something resonates with you to make decisions and guide you.

That’s what your inner voice is like.

Not knowing what that was like was… difficult for me. I did things I truly didn’t want to do and was so very easily frustrated and irritated. Not being able to listen to yourself is the same as not being in control of yourself. Outside thoughts can often incorrectly sway you at best, and make you feel like a slave to other people’s minds at the very worst. It’s not a cozy place to be.

So yea, I never want to go back to that. I never want to go back to fogginess and misdirection. I know what it feels like to do what you’ve made up in your mind to do, and be in control, and I only want to further that. I only want to expand my control over myself. I never want to go back to not knowing that.

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